Gladiators

Image Source

Channel 4 have been running a superb advertisement for the 2012 London Paralympics which start tomorrow. The advertisement is based upon the fact that the British Paralympic athletes are superhuman. Think about it; just for a few seconds please stop reading and think about it;

These people have a struggle to do things many take for granted, things such as; getting dressed, traveling to and from work, even mundane things like having a bath or going to the loo and that is before they start training. Each of them has adapted to, and overcome their personal difficulties and then gone further and learnt to compete at the very top of their chosen sports. This takes guts, determination and a singular focus on their goals.

These people are truly inspirational. In my eyes, the eyes of someone who finds just getting to tomorrow a struggle, they are magnificent, and yes they are in every sense of the word, Superhuman. My poem is dedicated to all of the Paralympians representing Great Britain, Go Team GB.

Gladiators

They stand proud.
Clothed in national colours
they form one body,
and that body exudes confidence.
The smiles on their faces betray them!
For these are smiles that know;
‘I can – I will’ and ‘I have’.

This knowledge;
born of unfathomable hardship
underpins all.
True - carbon fibre, plastics and alloys,
support bone, flesh and blood
but all are useless
without the knowledge.

So believe, British Gladiators,
believe and be proud.
And I will stand behind you
with a Nation that believes in -
and is proud of - you.

John Carré Buchanan
28 August 2012

7,000,000,000

The United Nations used yesterday to symbolically announce the birth of the 7 billionth human. The celebrations began in the Philippines, where baby Danica May Camacho* was born just before midnight on the 30th October.

Danica (which means Morning star) joins the rest of us on a planet which is quickly becoming overcrowded and devastated by mankind. The “celebrations” inspired me to write this poem;

(* in Photo from MSN Today News)

7 Billion

They say the world’s population
hit seven billion people today.
That’s a seven with nine noughts on the end,
And some say hip hip hip hooray!

I think that this is a tragedy,
for mankind is the scourge of the earth,
the fact that our population’s soaring
is hardly a reason for mirth.

We devour the planet’s resources
and pollute the streams and the air
the oceans are full of our garbage;
truth be known we don’t care

Oh, we pretend to be concerned
about the damage we do to the earth
but as soon as the price increases
we scream blue murder, and worse.

We allow our leaders to stagger
from one treaty to the next
and as soon as things get a bit tricky
all good intentions are vexed.

Our numbers will increase further,
They say a billion a decade or more.
We’ll end up fighting for water
like we’ve fought for oil before.

What a sorry state of affairs it is,
that our numbers have soured so high
without learning to share resources
and cherish all under the sky.

John Carré Buchanan
31 October 2011

9/11

I walked out of a classroom where I had been studying database engineering, conscious that the background noise had changed. On entering the headquarters, I kept hearing words ‘America’ and ‘New York’. Back in the office silent faces were turned to the wall mounted TVs which screened a permanent live news feed. I turned to look at the screen just in time to see the second attack take place.

Within minutes everyone was busy implementing plans that had been outlined to cover such events. All over the country military and government establishments were being cloaked in a huge security blanket which within hours would cover the whole nation. All the while eyes kept flicking to the TV screens which continued to play pictures of the tragedy in New York.

As that day unfolded images were forever scored onto billions of people’s retinas, images that will live with generations of people around the world. The towers slipping into the dust cloud, people jumping, and the tear stained dust covered faces of men and women who were on the streets of New York that day.

The military and civil servants in our headquarters were hardened people, most of them had been involved in preparing, supporting and conducting a wide variety of military operations around the world but this was different. We had all seen the effects of war and terrorism on civilian populations and many of us had witnessed genocide, but attacks on this scale and of this nature were almost unthinkable and there was an air of shock and disbelief.

Whilst the concept behind the attack was not new, (Tom Clancy wrote two books in the mid 90’s in which a passenger aircraft was flown into Congress.) it cannot be denied that the attacks on 9/11 were masterful in their simplicity and almost flawless in their execution. As military personnel we knew that the people who had planned the attacks would be sitting somewhere watching events unfold with a real sense of satisfaction, perhaps even pride. I doubt that even they could have anticipated such a spectacular success. The attack was so monumental and so well publicised that mention the date; 9/11 anywhere in the world and people will instantly know to what you are referring.

Ten years have passed and America and its allies have been in a constant war against an enemy which lives in the shadows; rising occasionally to strike before falling back into the darkness. It is true that America has had its successes most recently with the summary execution of Osama Bin Laden but when all is said and done; two wars have been initiated, hundreds of thousands of people have been maimed or killed; at a cost that would bankrupt many small nations (some would argue it has helped bankrupt the USA). Yet despite this the average American could not put a pin on a map of the world to mark countries such as Afghanistan, Iraq, Syria and Iran.

What is perhaps more worrying is that after all this time most Americans would not even begin to understand why their country was attacked in the first place. You may ask; ‘why do I say this is worrying?’ Well, I believe that the Chinese General and strategist Sun Tzu sums it up about 2400 years ago when he wrote;

“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

9/11

Though the smoke and dust are gone,
the souls of three thousand live on.
Two thousand parents taken away;
and three thousand children had to stay.
as four planes of terror crashed
the hopes of years to come were dashed.

Ten years on; a nation greaves
in city streets strewn with leaves.
In quiet suburbs beneath blue sky
people bow their heads and cry.
Images within their minds reside
of the day a nation’s innocence died.

A war on terror was declared
the people of world were scared.
Far off lands were torn to shreds
as troops dragged people from their beds.
Searching for the men who dared
attack a nation so unprepared.

Patriots of the United States
were unaware of all the hates.
They didn’t understand
why people in a far off land
could hate them for the way they act
with so very little tact.

Ten years have passed since the date
when terrorists expressed their hate.
America has waged a war
With dirty tactics we all abhor.
Torture and Extraordinary Rendition
are tools of hatred by tradition.

As they bow their heads and pray
for the souls lost on that fateful day,
may they see the reason it occurred
and realise spreading hatred is absurd.
They say; all men are created equal
Lord; please help them avoid a sequel.

John Carré Buchanan
09 September 2011

Flare Up

For forty years I had a real problem with religion. I travelled extensively as a child and I had seen the unfairness of poverty and a number of travesties religion was blamed for. Boarding School seemed to force religion down my throat with an endless cycle of services, prayers and hypocritical teachers and clergy doing the “do as I say”, rather than the “do as I do” routine. I then joined the Army and witnessed scenes which participants claimed to be doing in the name of their God (The God in question often being the same one). I even had a British military padre try to bayonet me on one occasion.

It seemed to me that religion was behind every conflict I was involved in. I was one of the people who said “I don’t mind people having faith and I will never criticise them but it is not for me.”

About four years ago I attended an Alpha course trying to better understand what my wife believed in; I was not convinced by the efficacy of the proof that was being presented as the reason to follow Christ. The one thing I did learn was that Faith means Faith, and it is not something to be proved, I also knew I did not have it.

Towards the end of last year I decided to examine my core belief structure, particularly paying attention to the reasons for certain beliefs. I did this in an attempt to help understand why certain characteristics such as determination and duty had had such strong effects on my life.

I began to talk to the priest at Lucy’s Church and also to the other people who attended. Initially I saw normal people enjoying their journey with Christ, but as I continued to attend I realised that these were not normal people, they seemed to have something about them which gave them an edge. They seemed to be happier, even in the face of adversity, and they seemed to really care about others. Not the normal sort of care where one carries an old ladies bag, but a care which runs much deeper than that. As I listened to the sermons, read passages from the bible and spoke to my new friends I realised that my 40 year view of religion was fundamentally flawed. It was the failings of people who caused strife in the world not religion. It was not long before I realised that I had found faith and had become a Christian.

The last month or so has been different for me. A cycle of no sleep for days on end, followed by a crash where I could not stay awake and then elevated pain for two days seems to have started up. Life seems to be 3-5 days awake 1-2 asleep and then 2 in pain over and over again. During this period depression was hunting me, but thanks to friends and the mental survival tools I have been given I have managed pretty well. What has made the difference is the fact that this time around I have my faith to help me get through the rough patches (known as Flare Ups) and I know that I am not alone and I am being prayed for.

The poem below describes what it is like to experience a flare up. The fact I could write the poem is evidence that my Faith in Christ and the support of the Church I have joined is helping me to survive.

Flare Up

The tormenting ache is obscured
replaced by searing agony.
I feel the flesh melt,
Imagine the blisters as they bubble,
blacken and crisp over.
The edges split and retract
to reveal red tissue below.
It blackens and the cycle starts again.

My mind tells me it’s not true,
burnt nerves can’t feel.
but this is no ordinary fire
no water can quench these flames.
Born deep within neural pathways
they burn as intense as
the a charcoal maker’s kiln
consuming all reason and sanity.

Bed covers lie thrown back
the soft linen had burnt;
as its folds crept like molten lava,
and scorched everything in their path.
The mind fights for control
looking to stem the flow
as if closing the sluice on a stream
but the gate valve is stuck

Thoughts are marshalled,
challenged and found wanting.
Well-rehearsed counter points are delivered.
Slowly control is regained.
Unhelpful thoughts rally for a final push
but once again the mind delivers a ‘coup de grace’,
another battle is won
and the leg will bare weight today.

John Carré Buchanan
19th August 2011

Progress

In 1991 I was presented a beautiful Blackthorn walking stick with a silver ferrule engraved by the organisation that gave it to me. At the time it was a gift I never thought I would use, but it has remained one of my treasured possessions ever since.

Over the last few years I have found myself relying on the stick more and more. Whilst my heart made me use the blackthorn, I must admit that the root knob was pretty uncomfortable in the hand. Eventually I bowed to the pressure of the red circle in the palm of my hand and bought myself a new walking stick. It was a rather smart mahogany colour Derby Cane with a brass ferrule and a handle offering a more comfortable grip.

Within two days I dropped the new stick and the varnish chipped, two months later the stick looked like I had owned it for years. The thick layer of hard coloured varnish was chipped all over and the “brass” ferrule had been scratched to reveal a cheap aluminium band underneath the brass top coat. Whilst the stick itself is well made the manufacturers had spoiled what could have been a quality product by applying a veneer of cheap coloured spray-on varnish to finish it off, presumably to cut costs.

Aware that the stick was looking scruffy I decided to remove the varnish and re-polish it. Having stripped the stick back to clean wood I applied layer upon layer of a natural wax polishing the stick well between each application. The finished product was a big improvement and I feel confident that it will continue to look good for some time to come.

The physical process of polishing the cane was quite cathartic and as I sat in my shed, or hobbled around the garden buffing up the stick with a rag torn from an old T shirt, I got to thinking about how the stick could be used as a metaphor for progress.

It occurred to me that our modern society is often so eager to get things done quickly, cheaply or easily, that that we end up taking shortcuts. At the time the shortcuts seem like a good idea, but they often result in some form of re-work being required to put things right, or a lesser quality product being produced.

I asked myself; will the furniture, toys and buildings of today stand up to the rigours of history as have the antiques and historical buildings we enjoy today? It seemed to me that in the rush to produce vast quantities at speed for as little as possible we have sacrificed quality in almost all areas of our endeavour.

Our foods are artificially flavoured, coloured and preserved, to the extent that some of the fruits and vegetables we eat have been stored for a year before reaching our tables and the nutritional content has been virtually eradicated.

In medicine doctors prescribe drugs designed to address specific symptoms, these often have unwanted side effects which require other drugs to be used in order that the first ones can be taken. This leads to a situation where the cocktail of drugs being taken can be more harmful than the original cause of suffering. The sad point is that it is often the symptom that is treated and not the cause.

Treating symptoms is common in modern society. Crime, substance abuse, social housing. jobs, education and even foreign policy, all suffer from the effects of policies designed to be the quick fix for one symptom or another. Unfortunately they seldom address the real issues and money and resources are squandered.

The poem below is a light hearted attempt to illustrate how progress can have negative side effects. What is more it suggests a solution to the problems of traffic congestion, childhood obesity, parental stress and does all this whilst having a positive effect on family finances.

Progress – School Run

I used to ride or walk to school,
along with all my friends.
Now I sit breathing fuel,
as travel time extends.

The car in front’s a four by four,
as is the one behind.
They seem to have kids galore,
In safety seats confined.

Mums put on lippy as they rush
to drop kids at the gate.
Then back to get a quick Red Bush
before a lunch with Kate.

The little darlings clamber out,
dragging bags behind them.
Mobile phones are quick dugout
the traffic becomes mayhem.

Some would call this progress;
plump kids and jammed up street.
But I would call it progress
if more would use their feet.

John Carré Buchanan
14 September 2010

The Toolbox

This morning I was still awake when the birds started the dawn chorus, it was the third time this week and the seventh in the last ten days. Once again I’d spent most of the night using a toolbox of mental exercises to ensure that I did not descend what I call the ‘Spiral of Doom'.

In essence the spiral is a model which explores the correlation between mood and the effect pain has on an individual. It is important to stress that the correlation is not between mood and the pain itself. On the downward trend, pain leads to deteriorating mood which makes the pain more noticeable and therefore the mood worsens, at the very bottom of this spiral lives the hell in which an individual believes self-harm is preferable to living with pain. Conversely if the mood is good the effect the pain has on the individual is lessened and life can become more enjoyable.

Assuming that in this model pain is a constant, there are two variables; the effect of the pain and the mood. There are ways to reduce the effects of pain; usually these involve the use of medical intervention of some kind. But a more practical, everyday way to influencing the spiral is to change the mood; this can be done by controlling the way thoughts are handled.

A thought is simply a collection of ideas, it is not anything more or anything less and it certainly is not a fact. That said it is possible to allow thoughts to catch in the mind and develop to the point where we truly believe them to be facts. When this happens an unfortunate incident like spilling the coffee ten minutes before giving a presentation can be elevated in the mind to the point where a whole day has been a total disaster. This is achieved by unhelpful thoughts such as;

“why is it always me? – I’m going to look like an idiot – the presentation is ruined.”

It is an unfortunate fact that unhelpful thoughts left unchecked will flash in and out of the mind sowing seeds which all too often go on to become self-fulfilling prophecies.

With practice it is possible to put the brakes on this process by challenging unhelpful thoughts. In the example above I could counter with something like;

“it doesn’t always happen to me, the presentation will be just as good even if I do have a coffee stain on my tie, and the lights will be dimmed so no one will notice the stain anyway.”

At times I have even written the answers down. It’s a bit like a Chinese take away menu; unhelpful thought number 7 gets challenged by helpful thought 4, 5 and 11. This ensured that I could get my responses in before the next harmful thought arrived. The list was written during the first few bouts, I found that the act of writing thoughts down slowed the process and gave me time to come up with better counter thoughts. These were then developed when I was a better able to think straight.

Eventually it became possible to recognise that I was having an unhelpful thought and I began to thank my mind for the thought but allow it to drift on as if it were a leaf on a river, by doing this I allowed life to progress without dwelling on the unhelpful thoughts.

You may have noticed that I use the terms helpful and unhelpful thoughts and not positive and negative, this is because “thinking positive” is not always the best approach. For instance if a person was to find a lump in their body and resolved to think positively about it they might find that by the time they visit the doctor it’s too late to do anything, Helpful thinking allows the individual to remain calm and assess the situation rationally and is more likely to result in an earlier visit to the doctor.

Having said all that; as I sat there listening to the dawn chorus (and secretly hoping that all 3 cats were out) I remembered the following quote from the 1970’s film “Kelly’s Heroes”;

‘Why don't you knock it off with them negative waves? Why don't you dig how beautiful it is out here? Why don't you say something righteous and hopeful for a change?’ -Sergeant Oddball.

This morning that turned out to be the turning point I had been looking for.

The Toolbox

I have a special toolbox,
it’s one you cannot see.
It’s full of very clever tools
that I find work for me.

The top draw holds the basics
the tools used every day
Information and knowledge
To help keep fear at bay

The bottom draw is bigger
it holds the tools I need
To keep my mind healthy
when pain my thoughts impede

Conventional ways of thinking
can cause the mind to lock
for logic and analysis
can’t every dam unblock.

I’ve tools designed to challenge
unhelpful thoughts and feelings.
These trusty friends I often use
to stimulate a healing.

A new tool that I’m learning
uses counter force to win
In theory it’s simple;
you welcome these thoughts in.

There’s the pebble in my pocket
The leaf upon a stream
the words I choose to frame it
SMART goals define a dream.

Some tools have roots in business
Whilst others are based in sport
I’ve learnt to pick and mix
to live the life I ought.

My toolbox is a treasure trove
it draws on my whole life
to furnish me with techniques
that help reduce my strife.

John Carré Buchanan
13 March 2011

The Bush Pilot

I had dinner with some friends last night. One of them is a pilot working for Mission Aviation Fellowship. (His blog can be found here; Biggles Abroad I so admire the work he does I thought I would pen a little something to honour it.

The Bush Pilot

They wait.
Keen eyes search the horizon
hoping for a glint of reflected sunlight.
Sharp ears filter the sounds of the bush
listening for the distant drone -
that heralds his coming.

This lifeline,
remains open where others have failed.
Some barred by conflict
others closed by weather, disasters or
just – too far from wealth,
and so he comes.

Transforming lives.
Bringing help, hope and love.
Flying people to safety.
Delivering food, medicine, equipment,
insight and encouragement
to those that need it.

Excitement soars,
a silvery light in the heavens,
approaches like an angel.
Dust, hopes and cheers rise
as the wheels touch the red earth
and the bush pilot steps down.

John Carré Buchanan
24 May 2011

Dedicated to the Pilots and Support Staff of MAF.

6A

We are often too busy to stop and look around and actually observe life. When I used to travel a lot there were frequently delays and all too often I would getting frustrated and wound up.

On the rare occasion that I was not rushing to get to the next meaningless event in my life, I would just sit back and watch the world go by. This is something I do a lot more of nowadays, I wish I had taken the time to do more of it back then.

6A

Old lady in front of me
with purple hair aglow.
Young man beside her
a face I think I know.

School girls sharing homework,
mild panic in their eyes.
Businessmen on Blackberries
yet to wear their ties.

The bell up front sounds again
and “High Viz” brushes past.
How I love this people watching
It’s really quite a blast.

John Carré Buchanan
30 August 2010